How to make lasting change in 2019




If only our New Year’s resolutions lasted as long as our hangovers from New Year’s Eve. How many times have you resolved to get in shape, lose those stubborn 10lbs, get a new job, or leave an unhappy relationship? We are going to do it differently this year! You really mean it this time! You’re eating well, going to the gym every day. You’re beating the internet like a rented mule to find the job of your dreams. 2019 is NOT going to end like 2018. In January you’re full of resolve only to see it fade into the distance in March or maybe even February.

I am the queen of resolutions. I’ve made them every year for as long as I can remember. I’m not really sure how many I’ve kept, but I’d guess that it wasn’t many. Last year was different. I resolved to change my diet and eat better and get healthier in the process. Voila! Success!

I’ve incorporated healthy eating in my life and actually have come to enjoy it. I eat more whole foods, less sugar and drink less alcohol. All in all it’s been a successful year. I’m not perfect, but I continue to tweak my diet and add in some exercise. I count this as a resolution well done.


In reflecting on why last year’s resolution lasted, I’ve come up with these tips to help you!

  1. Limit Limit yourself to three changes or less. Write these changes down the three things that keep you up at night. Is it diet? Exercise? Health? Relationship? Money? It’s difficult to make one resolution and let along 100. Spend some time thinking about the changes you REALLY want to see in your life and prioritize the top three.

  2. Focus Focus on the changes everyday. Write them down and start everyday with thinking about. Perhaps writing some steps you will take to implement your resolutions. Remember that change occurs one day at a time, sometimes one minute at a time. It takes a while for your brain and body to catch up with change. Before you go to bed write down the success you’ve had working on your resolutions today.

  3. Envision Envisioning a change is a powerful tool. Image yourself in 6-8 months if you keep working at it. Take a few moments to see your new self or to see yourself do the necessary activities to bring about your transformation.

  4. Think Incrementally Change occurs the same way that you eat an elephant, bit by bit. Don’t take on too much too soon. Set a goal for yourself every week and work every day to attain it. A life time of something feels impossible; a day of doing something feels doable.

  5. Discipline Yes, yes, that awful word. However, you need to discipline yourself to the task at hand. In many spiritual practices we are reminded of this word. If you want to lose weight, be on time, mend a relationship, it is going to take discipline to see results.

  6. Compassion Above all, be compassionate with yourself. If you slip, forgive yourself and remember what Scarlett O’Hara, “tomorrow is another day”. Resolve that tomorrow you will do better than you did yesterday.

I’m including a checklist that you can copy to use every week. Make a commitment to use it for three months. Let me know how it goes. You can either stay exactly where you are or make the change(s) that you long for, the choice is yours.



Checklist for Transformational Change

Intention - Motivation - Transformation

Week _________________________

Date__________________________

Change___________________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________________

Envision____________________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________________________

Daily Behavior_______________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

Focus_____________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

Results____________________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________________

Life will only change when you become more committed to your dreams than you are to your comfort zone. -Billy Cox_




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